Saturday, December 6, 2008

The Day the Music Died

I lost my chi. Either I dropped it somewhere or someone stole it from me.

Whatever it is that's keeping me up is gone, down the drain, into the shit basin below the ground we stand on.

I guess there comes a time when even the best warrior gets tired of fighting.

Today I realized, I am tired, not of fighting but of finding a way to fight. I've been trying to come up with the best combat move but nothing seems to work. My efforts have consistently been futile. For the past months or years, I have that kind of consistency.

Definitely not something to be happy about.

I must be doing something massively wrong. Or I am the wrong.

I don't know.

Right now I feel bad, really bad. Not-your-ordinary-I'm-on-a-drama-spree kind of bad. Nor the I'm-gonna-kill-myself kind of bad. I feel so bad to think of such things.

All I want to do is retreat to my tent and find out what is there for me as reality intends. I could start with that.

But if I don't bounce back, if I don't recover after this, I'm going to have to take my bow.

After all, my workshop cannot stay open forever.

2 comments:

Voice of the Rainbow said...

Tye, phase lang ito!!! HaHaHa!

I'm here for you, alright?

Paano na ako kung bigla kang huminto?! WAAAAHHHHHH!!!!

Voice of the Rainbow said...

http://voiceoftherainbow.blogspot.com

I changed the address, template, even the title, took out some stuffs, and am taking baby steps.

The reason: http://tiffanymylove.blogspot.com

I am a serial killer of second rate trying hard copy cats!

Super shock! He reads my blog kahit na he pretends he doesn't. So I don't know if he did this on purpose, to probably make me feel I should really give up on him. Hindi naman ako stupid. And he knows I really don't like the song "More Than Words" - kasi I cannot express my feelings verbally.

So, blogging has wounded me further. I just found the blog last week, sa kagagahang silipin ang user profile nya, even before I posted my last entries sa Martians... Pero, so far, I'm staying.

Stay with me.