Www-wedding?

I woke up with one thought in mind: Today is Wendi’s wedding. It’ll be the day’s big event.

Note to self: Buy a gift wrapper with a matching gift tag.
Thought balloon: Why don’t I get these things for free? I work at Hallmark, for crying out loud!

I have a gift, I have a decent wardrobe, I can whip something that will resemble make-up, I just have to comb my hair for a change—to make the day special, and what else? Ahh, Mom tells me to spray on perfume. Good. I can pretend to be “formal”.

I hail a cab. The driver seems clueless as to where the Our Lady of Pentecost or Loyola Heights is. Well at least he knew Katipunan Avenue. I will have to confiscate his license if he didn’t. We nearly missed our turn. Good thing my geographically challenged brain is lucky today. Female intuition must be kicking in. I instruct the driver to turn here and there as if I know where we are going. As soon as we spotted the Church, the driver, who was silent the whole time said, “aatend ka pala ng kasal.”

Note to self: Be nice.
Thought balloon: Tama! Ano naman ang akala nyo, Manong? Feel ko lang magmaganda?

Great! I’m early. The bride, my friend, is not yet around. Only men in barong are present. And I doubt if the groom even knows my name. He must be thinking, “Hey, I have seen this girl from somewhere but I have no idea who she is.”

So I find a spot where I will be able to blend with the empty seats, away from people who actually knew each other. It’s no one’s fault really. The invitation says 2:30 p.m. Thanks to my theater background (not to mention very cooperative stomach) I made it not only on time but ahead of time. Yes, sometimes my theater training still makes it presence felt.

At least I have a few moments alone to shoo away yesterday’s crappy mood. And I also have time to psych myself for this event—for a wedding, that is.

Note to self: Don’t puke.
Thought balloon: I’ll get through this.

The invisible choir is really good, the bride looks beautiful, the holy matrimony thing is not stiff at all, and the flower girls are quite entertaining. Wow, Wendi and her gang has pulled off the first half well! And I can still smile.

Now off to the reception. The club house feels cozy even for a semi-stranger like me. The hosts have fed me well. Everyone seems pleased.

Whoops, why didn’t I think of the tossing of the bouquet before? Yeah, although I don’t feel like it, I am a single woman. I am required to huddle behind the bride’s back as she tosses her bouquet.

Note to self: Do not crush or kick the bouquet if ever it lands close to you.
Thought balloon: No bride or groom or guest, for that matter, will find that funny.

Positive thinking may save me. Well actually I am thinking the negative, which for me is absolutely positive. “Pretty bouquet, don’t you dare come near me!”

My positively negative thought did save me. Hallelujah!

This wedding is turning out really well. Not pretentious at all. Thus making it better than well. And although I am just a supposedly stress-free spectator, I am more than happy to have survived it.

Note to self: Don’t judge an occasion just because it is a wedding.
Thought balloon: Maybe a wedding truly is a happy event. Maybe all the preparations—the church, the choir, the flowers, the gowns and barongs, the luxurious car, the caterer, the band, the audio-visual presentation, the cake, the souvenirs—are all worth an event that runs for at least six hours. Maybe it is possible for an individual to find his “perfect” match. Maybe there really is such a thing as love—it being forever though is not guaranteed but at least it exists. Maybe a couple say their “I do’s” because they want to, not because the have to. Maybe a wedding is not a bad thing. Maybe it is not a death sentence after all. And maybe there is hope in it.

Maybe this wedding has gotten into me. Maybe I will survive the one on December. Maybe I will not fail the bride by then. Maybe I’ll turn out to be a better maid-of-honor than a sister. Maybe I will be able to prove that I am not a disappointment, or a wrong choice. Maybe I will feel better by then. Maybe I will be a better person when that time comes.

And who knows, maybe, just maybe I will actively try to catch the bouquet by then…

Poof!

There are some things even my thought balloon cannot handle.

COMMENTS

yes, hindi ko na-handle yon. kala ko pa naman e kabatak kita sa "not-the marrying-kind-club" forever and ever. charter member pa naman tayo noon!
anyhoo, the essay got me thinking about the exact same thing. maybe the bouquet will eventually fall on my feet, or it might hit me so hard on the head that i just MIGHT decide i would want to get married one fine June day.
who knows?
but seriously tye, you already are a better person. you had always been your "best person". you just needed to know that, i guess.
now if only your ate would realize that you are not the MAID OF HONOR but the BEST MAN, then everything would be ok.
Posted by: Nikka | November 1, 2006 10:17 AM

Hehe, Nikka, kabatak mo pa rin ako. Kita mong di kinaya ng thought balloon ko i-entertain ang idea of getting hitched someday.
And thanks sa comment mo. Lalo na sa BEST MAN part. That's the only sensible comment I got from this whole wedding thing. ;-)
Posted by: Tyrene | November 2, 2006 06:58 AM