Making a List

I just finished the last of the iced tea pack Nichi had requested our dad to buy for him. And, Nichi, he’s one who gives weight to the word ICE in “iced tea.” Even on his final days, he wanted the ice present in his tea.

Lately, I have been contemplating on the things Nichi left, like that pack of iced tea. I have this list in mind:

- Yung plato niyang may design na sili. (Pampagana! Not that he needs appetite boosters, but the plate just suited him for some cute reason.)

I just saw my dad using Nichi’s plate. I asked him, “[Dad] sa ‘yo na yang plato ni Nichi?” He let out a sigh-ish laugh. I added, “Baka ganahan ka na nyan. Tataba ka na.” Dad said, “Sana nga.”

- Mga things nya. Nichi is one of the most organized people whom I know. He doesn’t leave his slippers lying around, lost in the middle of the house. He has a knack for leaving them in one corner placed side by side, like a well-behaved pair of footwear.

Nichi’s slippers are now with Ate in Singapore. However Nichi’s other stuff are still where he left them: at several parts of our house, inside the drawers and boxes he so tediously kept in order. There he keeps his drawing notebooks with really wonderful sketches. (He learned to draw people starting with doodles, a style he acquired from the drawing-the-manga-way books he bought this year.) He also has his diary which, amazingly, is full of positive thoughts despite how his treatments have been rough on him. Then there are his Yugi-oh cards; the pellet gun with a red laser light—the one he forced me to buy in Divisoria and which he boasted to Ate Win when Ate came home to be with Nichi on what-was-his-final-days; two pencil cases; an mp3 player; and his prized collection of Gundam Robots among others.

- Aside from the iced tea, there are still some of Nichi’s Stick-O and 2 big packs of yellow M&Ms left. The big bottle of Heinz Ketchup Nichi half-consumed is also there at our fridge. There's also the box of unpopped popcorns we bought him during our last visit at the supermarket. The pharmacy part of our refrigerator remained untouched until my dad cleaned it yesterday. A lot of Nichi’s meds are there. I saw a half-filled bottle of Dilantin and unopened bottle of Purinethol along with other drugs Nichi religiously took when he was still alive.

- Nichi’s toys are everywhere in the house. There are the battleship game and the control pad for PC which I gave him for Christmas. He also has a Mastermind game which was a pasalubong from Ate Win. Then there's the Risk: Starwars, Clone Wars Edition which he bought with his own savings. He has two remote control cars and two remote control helicopters. There’s also the PS2 Kuya Wah gave him which Nichi tried to enjoy even when his fingers were too weak to press the buttons of the control pad.

- Last night I saw the mini Guyito Nichi painted last year.

- He also has some books. One of which is the “Emperor’s New Clothes” which I gave him. He won best actor in his class back when he was in grade six (or five) for playing the emperor. He did a hilarious re-enactment of that role for us, his whole family, to see his winning portrayal. Too bad we don’t have it on video.

- Nichi left a lot of photos. There’s a series of pictures he himself took which he called “egg.” It featured his bald head everywhere in our house. He has many videos with the help of our brother, Jowin and Mic, who both have a flair for home moviemaking. Needless to say, Nichi was always their willing actor. Nichi also left several voice recordings in his cellphone and in Ate's and my cellphone; on tape; and I guess, on his mp3 player. I have yet to check if the singing voice he recorded in Ate’s Magic Sing has been preserved.

- Nichi left his 2nd Friendster account with a comment “Add nyo ako…” (We can no longer access his first account because even he forgot its password.) Perhaps, we can still do as he wishes. You can add him and we will accept you in his behalf. His email address is nichole_delgado@yahoo.com. Incidentally, the background which he set for his Friendster account features Xmen’s Archangel flying towards...heaven, I guess.

- Nichi left us with a lot of good memories which, despite us missing him, will forever paint a smile on our faces. Mom was right in thanking Nichi for making us happy during the times when he was still around.

- Nichi left his classmates and friends whose presence brings comfort, at least for me, because those children are just some of the people Nichi cared about other than us, his family.

- Nichi left his youth and dreams which is kind of frustrating but every time I remember that at least he lived his 13 years to the fullest, I feel a bit better.

- Nichi left us, his family, partly grieving for our loss but partly relieved that at least this time Nichi no longer has to suffer.