Under the Weather

Ha-choo!

I swear! Sneezing drains a whole lot of my energy. After one heart-full sneeze, I feel weak. Devoid of whatever powers I have. Imagine what a chain of sneezes does to me.

More than once, I tried having fun with sneezing. Even if sneezing is an involuntary reaction to a spontaneous stimuli, I, the perennial control freak, tried to manipulate my sneezes in such a way that I utter synonyms of the word “sneeze” while sneezing.

Before anything else, I tried “sneeze!” Do Americans really “sneeze?” (This question is similar to asking if American chickens really say “Cock-a-doodle-doo!” whereas ours simply say, “Tik-ti-la-ok!”) Because if Americans really do “sneeze,” then they do it with a smile. Try it! You’ll catch yourself smiling, too.

“Ha-choo” produces a solid surge of spit and what-have-you.

“Ha-ching” is so demure and is almost neat.

“Ba-heng,” on the other hand, is as scandalous as it is messy.

“Ching” alone, is bitin to say the least. Kulang sa buwelo kung baga. It’s like letting out a stifled blow.

Some people seem to not make a sound when sneezing which I can’t pull off. It freaks me out. I feel like my eardrums are going to break if I don’t make a sound.

I don’t know when my next set of sneezes will attack. It can be in a few minutes or so. The way my nose is congested right now and is at the same time runny, a crazy streak of sneezes is certainly lurking just around the corner.

I better think of something new to say when I start bursting again. It will, at the very least, make being sick a bit entertaining.

By the way, I saw the episode of Myth Busters on sneezing. And they busted the myth which says your eyeballs will pop-out if you sneeze with your eyes open. They induced several sneezes from Adam. And they went to great lengths to keep his eyes open while he let out a powerful blow. His eyes never came off. They almost peed in their pants laughing at how funny he looked. I guess, some people are crazier than I am, huh?