R U +639064579912 ?

By now, I’ve got a strong feeling that my cellphone number is written, not only at the door of a public toilet, but also at the back of a bus seat. Now that promises a bigger audience!

What are the chances that one gets weird texts at least once a month? I get one set of weird texts on almost a monthly basis now. That’s how frequently I receive messages that are, umm, ahh, entertaining to some degree yet equally time consuming. And the thing is, I save my TEXTERS’ numbers—note that TEXTER is in plural. No number bugs me at two different times.

The number I used in my title, +639064579912, which found its spot in my phonebook under the name, “Raketeer,” is my most recent visitor. Here goes Raketeer’s text:

hon d2 ka nalang reply or call asap mahalaga sasabihen ko sayo send ka load 150pesos last txt na e2

Let’s deconstruct. All letters were typed in the lower case. Texter must be in a relaxed state while texting or he may be too much in a hurry to switch cases. Hey, texter even waived the use of proper punctuations and correct spacing between words! The sense of urgency is alarming especially with the use of “call,” “asap,” “mahalaga,” and “last txt na e2.”

But what gave the scam away? Contrary to what it may seem, it’s not the “hon.” It’s the “150pesos.” I would have considered the text a wrongly sent message but the amount of money it asked for was pretty much suspicious. No person in a hurry to make contact on the phone would ask that much load. It’s stench is beyond fishy.

Lucky for me I had the means to reply. I had this to say to Raketeer:

“Hon,” ang tindi ng raket mo ha! 150 pesos?! tsk tsk. kaya d umaasenso ang Pilipinas! Lakas naman ng loob mo mag-cellphone!

I may have gone jologs with my reply, but you have got to admit, I hit my point well.

* * *

Going through my phonebook now, I see two more of my texters’ numbers:

Bmytxtm8 : +639167954465
Da who ang epal n 2: +639277536093

If you know any of them, I suggest you inform them that they’re being punished for bugging me. And if you happen to be one of them, well, now the world can be your textmate. No medium can pull a bigger audience than the World Wide Web, right?

It beats any public toilet door or bus seat for that matter.