Blessings Instead of Sheep

Instead of writing something about the movie "Love Actually" which I actually love--the "love is all around" idea is key--I shall instead write something more worthwhile.

Like being happy.

You see, optimism is not intrinsic to me. I am better at sarcasm and it is easier for me to indulge in cynical thoughts. But these days, I choose to see the brighter side of life. Everyday, there is a conscious effort on my part to stay positive. To smile right when things go tough and, well, shitty.

I learned it the hard way. To see the light at the end of a rough murky road. Just think of it this way, when you're down, you've got no where else to go but up. And up there I choose to stay.

In my almost 30 years around, I realized it is more convenient to stay happy than to sulk, mope, curse the world and radiate negative energy.

Thinking "ang malas ko" is light years behind in terms of making us feel better.

Knowing how lucky we are certainly guarantees priceless goodnight sleep. I'm all for that.

Mag-Ingat sa Taxi: Nakamamatay

Hamaharurot ang taxing nasakyan namin. Para bang may taxing naghihintay sa taxing ito. In a hurry si kuya driver, I don't know why.

At sa background, maririnig ang pagpreach ng mga tao sa radyo tungkol sa bible or something--hindi ako nagpe-pay attention. Automatic na nagsha-shut-off ang utak ko sa mga ganoong bagay.

Maya-maya pa, muntik kaming mag-slam sa isang truck ng Coca-cola. Tamang-tama. Ang kasabay ko sa taxi ay sort of queen ng Coke--don't ask why.

Nabuhay naman kami. Pero si kuya, ewan ko kung anong ginagawa sa taxi niya at para kaming nasusubsob kada attempt niyang mag-break. Natutunan ko sa Physics class ko noong high school na it has something to do with that thing called "inertia." But what the heck!

Di na ako nakatiis sa ginagawang shake-the-pasahero syndrome ni kuya, "Ano ba ang nangyayari sa inyo, kuya?"

"Wala yata tayong preno," sagot niya.

"Ha?!" Sabay yata kaming naloka ng kasama ko.

"Wag niyo na lang bilisan ang pagmamaneho," advise ng kasama ko. Effort niya ito para pahabain ang buhay namin. Dagdag pa niya, "Hindi naman kami nagmamadali."

Nag-I-second-the-motion ako. "Oo nga kuya. Matutulog lang naman kami pag-uwi sa mga bahay namin."

Matigas ang ulo ni kuya. Naramdaman na naman niya ang need for speed. Tapos nag-break na palpak naman sabay sabi, "hindi talaga kumakagat ang preno."

"Ay sus, sana sinarili nyo na lang, kuya. Ninernerbyos na tuloy ako." Suddenly narealize ko na ignorance is bliss.

"Bagalan niyo na lang ang paandar, kuya. Moderate speed lang. Moderate." Paalala ng kasama ko.

"Hindi kakayanin ng nanay ko kapag may nangyari sa akin...nauubos na ang mga anak niya!" Hirit ko for more drama lang.

Dagdag naman ng kasama ko habang aktong nagtetext, "Nay, nakasakay po ako sa taxi na may plate number TXT 326... [Kung anuman ang mangyari, alam nyo na...]"

Eto namang si kuya natawa pa! Balik harurot. Drag racer yata siya noong past life niya.

"Kuya, sa rightmost part lang kayo ng kalye. May pink fences kasi sa kaliwa." Nag-warn na naman ang aking kasama. Pareho kasi kaming muntik nang mabangga sa fences na iyon sa magkaibang insidente.

"Accident prone area yan, kuya. Nalusotan lang namin noon dahil may preno yung magkaibang taxi na sinasakyan namin," paliwanag ko while doing the Rey Pumaloy "Aminin" gesture.

Ayun na nga.

Unang bumaba ang kasama ko. Inendorse pa niya ako kay kuya para naman makauwi ako nang matiwasay given na ilang metro na lang e nasa bahay na ako.

Nai-deliver naman ako ni kuya right at my doorstep nang safe and sound. At dahil doon, nagawa ko pa siyang sabihan, bago ako bumaba sa taxi, na mag-iingat siya.

Sa gitna ng mga kaguluhan, nagawa pa ni kuyang i-challenge ang relihiyon ko at i-require akong makining sa pag-tuligsa ng mama sa radyo sa supposed na paniniwala ko. Iyon ang pangalawang dahilan kung bakit ako naman ang humarurot sa pagbaba ng taxi.

Tinext ko ang kasama ko na nakauwi naman ako ng maluwalhati...ewan ko na lang kung anong mangyayari kay kuya.

Maya-maya, yung kasama ko naman ang nagtext sa akin na safe na rin siya sa bahay nila.

Ang sabi ko sa kanya, pasasaan ba't si kuya naman ang magtetext sa amin na safe na rin siya.

Eto na nga siguro ang nagawa ng near-death experience namin sa gabing ito.

Achieve!

Bakit naging LSS of the week ang "Gusto kong Umawit"? Bakit buong linggo yata akong puyat last week? Bakit sinasabi kong hindi na talaga ako magkakajowa sa mga pinaggaga-gawa ko sa buhay ko? Bakit may utang akong Grande Mocha Frap sa isang graphics artist na kapitbahay ko pala?

Eto Panoorin nyo...

4 Photos to document my day

Got the front row seat to witness one special day for the longest running noontime show in the country.


Yes, they are late President Cory Aquino's Four Honor Guards: Army Pfc. Antonio Cadiente, Airman Second Class Gener Laguindam of the Air Force, Navy Petty Officer 2 Edgardo Rodriguez, and Police Officer 2 Danilo Malab, Jr.


Happy paints for happy kids.


My working hands--doubled as scratch paper and palatte.

For the third time around, let’s make a brave bunch of kids extra happy this Christmas!

For two years, we’ve given the Hematology and Oncology patients of the Philippine Children’s Medical Center (PCMC) extra smiles by presenting them with gifts containing art materials and books, and by distributing balloons for Christmas. We were also able to put up a face-painting booth especially for these brave bunch of kids during the Christmas Party hosted by Project: Brave Kids. All of these were made possible by the combined efforts of many people.

This year, we still hope to give away art materials (drawing books, crayons, pencils, etc.) so that these children will have a way of taking their minds off of the life-threatening illnesses that inflict them such as Leukemia, Thalassemia, and Tumor.

We also wish to add a treatment kit to the now traditional gifts we give them. The treatment kit will include a bag, bottle of alcohol, pack of cotton balls, plaster, gauze, etc.—all of which will be useful in their regular visits in the hospital, the place that has become their second home.

With your help, we can once again come up with 150 gifts (art materials and treatment kit) which we can distribute during the Christmas week.

If you wish to share cash or anything in kind, you can contact us at kids_happy@ymail.com.

Merry Christmas!

--From the family and friends of Nichi, a brave kid, turned angel

Twas a Sunday when I felt Normal again

For a few months now, I've been spending my Sundays unconscious--trying desperately to catch up on the chronic sleep deprivation brought about by the lifestyle I chose to embrace. I say "trying desperately" because I am aware that one cannot really make up for lost...well..err sleep.

Sunday has become a day of rest to indulge in my hedonistic ways, if not laziness.

But this Sunday was different. I woke up. Sat in front of the TV for a few hours. Cleaned my room--well most of it--let's just say I was able to get rid of a few clutters and much dust. Dust which I abhor by the way. I was able to go to the mall to have my eyeglasses fixed. (Clumsy me dropped my poor eyeglasses on the floor causing one lens to pop.) Went to another mall to buy a couple of shirts. (Loved it!) Got home to do a household chore. Found the time to do my personal laundry--by "personal laundry" I mean my personal clothing which I wouldn't ask anyone to clean for me. And finally, clean my finger and toe nails--a must-do which I sacrifice every time my weekend proves to be short.

I felt like were a normal person again.

Paano ako natuto mag-Ingles?

2 words: Sesame Street

Mula spelling hanggang pronunciation, sa Sesame Street ko nakuha ang basics.

At ngayon 40 years na sila. Ilan pa kayang mga tulad ko ang natuturuan nila?

Yes, may pagka-ginulo ng Sesame Street ang kultura ko bilang Pinoy but just the same, ang intervention nito sa edukasyon kong sinagot ng telebisyon worked to my advantage. Bilingual ako ngayon.

Sina Big Bird at Snuffy, Cookie Monster, Oscar the grouch, Grover, Maria at Luis, pati na yung typewriter na panay ang pag-aaksaya ng papel at mahilig mag "niw-niniw-niniw" at iba pang dabarkads sa world's most famous street ay tumatak na sa akin the right way. (It is important to note na, although I regularly watched Sesame Street, Batibot was always there to take care of my Filipino education on TV.)

Nakakatuwa.

Eto ang cute na "intrusion" nila sa Google:

And so here's how it goes...

If my life were a tiny room, the part of me which I devote to my family and myself is the sole furniture inside that tiny room--a locker perhaps. The rest of the room is that part of my life spent at work.

I'd like to believe this happened by choice.

Not some kind of a curse.

* * *

A few days ago, I was thinking of a quote which may just as well be used as my epitaph,

"If anything happens to me, let it be known that I was happy."

Because I am.

* * *

Then I get hit by a thought that made me think.

"What wrong did I do now?"

Days of the dead for the living

Undas has become my least favorite holiday. It all started 3 years ago when death became more real to me than it originally was.

The first time I had to face my brother's "pad" on the first of November--until now, I can't find a euphemism for "tomb", thus the word "pad"--I felt a sharp knife stab my heart. I could not stop the stream of tears from flowing.

Nichi passed away on a July, roughly four months prior to the most painful November first of my life. For that long, I tried to make myself believe that Nichi was just on vacation somewhere far.

Seeing the name of my brother on the slab of black tile mounted among other black tiles with names of unfamiliar dead people sealed everything. It was a slap on my face. Harsh and true.

Three years after, the pain is still there. Staring at his "wall" with the silver inscriptions of his beginning and end, of his face, of the flowers we wouldn't normally give him if he were still his old active self--it reminds me of what I've lost. It makes me wonder what he would have been like if he were still around. How he'd be dealing with his classes which he attended by heart. How many more friends he'd be gaining, given his congenial personality. How many songs he can sing. All of which will remain a mystery. Unanswered. Perhaps forever.



This is in memory of Nichi...the eternally 13-year-old boy who will forever stay alive in my heart.

Fame! Yes! 2 sq mm of it...

Flip magazine.



Read a feature.



Say my silent ohh's and ahh's as I relate to some lines, being that I am sort of an insider to the topic.



A couple of flips more and there I see. My 2 square millimeter of fame!



***Malupet na hirit ni Mina: May mas maliit pa sa 2 sq. mm of fame ko. palagay ko 1sq mm na ito, but somehow she spotted me.



...sa maniwala man kayo o sa hindi, ako yung tinuturo ng yellow arrow.

bow.

weE-Bit Heroes

Ang natutunan ko siguro ngayong linggo na, hopefully, ay matututunan ko nang i-combat sa mga darating na araw ay ang fact na hindi kasing dali bumuo ng bagay-bagay na napapanood sa TV kagaya ng inaakala natin, kahit na 10-15 mins lang ito tatakbo.

Andaming elements na kelangang pagsama-samahin. Nakakaloka! Mabuti me mga taong handang tumulong sa abot ng kanilang makakaya. (By the way, sila ang aking heroes!)

Nung isang gabi napatira ako ng 2 shawarma at 1 cup ng ice cream sa isang sitting dahil na-sorta depressed na ako sa aking journey towards making my work...work.

But yesterday, marami ang napaluha. Kinilig naman ako. Ibig sabihn may saysay ang pinaggugugulan ko ng oras. Dahil may na-touch. At hopefully may buhay nabago, may taong natuto.

Sulit na ang dalawang oras na tulog kung ganon.

* * *

Sa sidelines. Less than a minute after the mass crying spree sa studio:

Melvin: Naiyak ka rin?

ako: hindi.

Melvin: (puzzled. siguro)

ako: Nauna na kasi ako...

* * *

Ganito magwork ang adrenaline. Sa panahon ng kagipitan, naturally nagsesecrete ang katawan natin ng hormones na may spinach-ni-Popeye effect. Bigla kang lalakas nang bonggang bongga. Solb ang anumang problema.

Adrenaline saved my sequence guide. Sa dulo ng week, natuyot na ang utak ko. Wala na akong masulat na maganda, let alone, may sense. Itinulog ko. Before I knew it, 2 hours before the show na. Ayun na. Adrenaline rushed--ika nga. I don't think "moment of clarity" ang tawag doon. Kasi with two hours of sleep, my thoughts was logically hazy. Pero ayun, nagawan ko ng paraan. Hay...

But let me just say, parang may tumulong luha mula sa akin sa isang linya na isinulat ng aking adrenaline. Kaya ko rin siguro nasabing "nauna na ako". If you get my drift.

* * *

Maikling kwento ng kabayanihan.



May dalawang magkapatid. Si Kuya, nawala ang paningin when he was just 16 years old, matapos operahan dahil sa kanyang brain tumor. Si utol naging guide niya, mata niya at driver niya. Araw araw inaangkas siya sa kakaragkarag na bike para ihatid siya sa school.

Hindi na nag-aaral si utol. Naging finish line na ang high school. Wala na kasing moolah ang pamilya. Si Kuya 4th year high school na. (Naunahan na siya ni Utol gumradweyt dahil natigil siya noong nagkasakit siya 4 years ago.) Chances are, titigil din siya mag-aral next school year.

Pero hindi nagdadrama ang magkapatid. Kahit na ded na si mama nila at kahit na naputol na ang right leg ni papa. Si kuya pa nga ayun at nagpapaaktib sa grupong ng mga may kapansanan. Minsan din niyang ininsist ang right to quality education ng mga batang tulad niya.

Good kids sila. Kaya sila ay pinagpala. Kahit saglit mang maituturing. Dahil alam naman nating hindi naman tumitigil ang buhos ng obstacles ng buhay.

Pero we need not worry about sa mag-utol na ito. Dahil mabuti silang bata. They will find their way, the way they always have.

Isang swabeng kurot sa puso ang kwento nila.

* * *

Wish ko i-share itong first thing I wrote which has been translated into Braille:



Ano ang ibig sabihin?

"Sa mahabang daan na aming tinatahak, lumang bisikleta ang aming hawak. Ngunit ngayon ay napapanahon upang ang luma'y maging bago. Bagong bisikleta para sa bagong paglalakbay!"

* * *

Para sa tunay na kwentong EB Heroes pumunta lang sa http://www.eatbulaga.tv/ebheroes/index.htm

Magandang Umaga, Pilipinas

What better way to start the day than to be greeted by a train-long apocalyptic sight like this.



Ano ba? No one needs this kind of sh*t. Not after Ondoy, or Pepeng. Konting pagkapa naman...

"Yes, I do sleep around...our house...on Sundays."

...ay naku, may mga bagay kasi na unnecessary. alam mo yon? including yung mga stressors na pwede naman iwasan. ika nga, "life is short."

sayang ang oras natin sa mga UNNECESSARY drama.

yun lang.
i rest my case.

The Adventure of Sister Tyrene

"She is 'Sister Tyrene'. She is boring." This is how Direk Poochie introduced me to Bossing.

Finally the man whom I have watched on TV, and even on the silver screen, has found the time to acknowledge my presence. But I was too preoccupied with Direk Poochie's introduction to absorb the fact that, finally, Philippine TV's Bossing knows of my existence, amidst me crossing paths with him inside the studio for the last five months.

"She is Sister Tyrene. She is boring." I could not let the words go. Since when did I become boring? So boring that someone--with power, at that--will verbalize the supposed boredom I allgedly radiate. Never mind the "sister." Where I previously worked, I was called "saint." "Sister"demotes me to being human. I rather prefer sisterhood than sainthood.

And so I dare ask again, "since when did I become boring?"

* * *

A photo to document that night, that encounter:

A New-Age Beatitude

"Blessed are they who have the luxury of sleep, for when all the sleep-deprived drop dead, THEY shall inherit the earth."

ano ba!?

"Patrick Swayze passed away peacefully today with family at his side after facing the challenges of his illness for the last 20 months,"

--'Dirty Dancing' star Patrick Swayze dies at 57
http://movies.yahoo.com/news/movies.ap.org/39dirty-dancing39-star-patrick-swayze-at-57-ap

Bakit nalulungkot pa rin ako ng extra sa mga ganitong balita at phrasing?

The Sixth-Month Soliloquy

Anim na buwan…ang haba noon! Di ko akalain na mabilis lang sya dadaan.

Pero ayan na nga. Kumusta na? Eto, buhay pa. Ang bonus e masaya pa rin naman.

Pagbabago? Marami. For one nababawasan na ang OC-ness. Keri ko nang mabuhay nang walang tissue o alcohol sa bag. Keber na rin minsan ang “wash your hands before you eat anything” mantra—which technically is not good but considering how it implies the great leap with regard my tolerance on things, oks na siya.

Hindi na rin ako nale-late. Well, let me rephrase, bihira na lang akong nale-late. Milestone rin yon considering how late I end my day and how early I should start it, plus the four rides I have to contend with just to get to work everyday. I can’t help but think, “I must be loving what I am doing!”

Ano pa? Hindi na lang ako ang nakakarinig ng aking mga sinusulat. Di man alam ng iba, minsan ako ang nagsasalita sa mga napapanood nila. Bongga!

Anong mahirap? Lahat! Anong madali? Lahat nang naisip mong mahirap. Nasabi ko nga minsan, may times na feeling mo ang tanga-tanga mo. Minsan naman palakpak tenga mo dahil parang ang galing mo. Balanse lang. Tatapak at tatapak pa rin ang paa mo sa lupa.

Parang eskwelahan lang ng totoong buhay. Madaming natutunan. Pwedeng mag-take notes as you go along. Ingat lang dahil sa bawa’t mali, baka sa hukay ang hantong. OA? Medyo lang. Parang ganoon kasi minsan. Parang any-any mamamatay ka sa dami ng gagawin. Mauuna ka pang ma-dead sa deadlineS mo. Pero araw-araw din ramdam mong buhay ka, dahil sa dami ng iyong ginagawa, it seems na your existence matters. Hindi ka lang white elephant sa sarili mong buhay.

Masaya? Oo. Masaya. Chocolate ko yata. Yung indulgence na you can’t get enough of.

Hanggang kelan? Ewan. Ang mahalaga e naeenjoy ko lang. Ganoon naman, di ba? Do what you gotta do. As long as it makes you feel whole. Tanggal ang butas. Ayos pa bukas.

Yun lang naman.

Of Debts and Depths

The one thing I learned from those who came before me
Is to avoid debts as debts can be
A force powerful enough to suck you to its complications
such that the depths of the debt can hurt
the most innocent bone, neuron and even flesh.

I wish to stay away
for if lessons are not learned,
at least by someone like me,
what good will the troubles be
of those who came before me?

But now I see myself
in the depths of the debt I tried to stay away from
as if it were haunting me...
It's a viscous cycle, you see?

I only wish I could break free.
I only wish I could break free.

Half-Naked Man Lay Half-Dead in Xavierville. So what.

The man was naked from the waist up. Thank god for the clothing from the waist down! He rested along the gutter, his legs clutched his bicycle. Well, I suppose it was his bike. He barely moved--or should I say he did not move. For a minute I thought he was dead.

I wonder if anyone else saw him other than me. Because nobody made a fuss out of the sight of a man lying almost lifeless along Xavierville Avenue at around 9 p.m.

I asked the lady nearby, "ate, wala bang tanod o pulis dito? ...kasi, o, baka dead na siya (pointing to the man)".

My expression of concern ended there.

A disturbing thought. You can drop dead along this avenue and no one would care. Yay!

Two Moms, One Morning

Last week, the Philippines mourned the loss of one of its most loved mothers. An icon, a revered proponent of democracy. Former President Cory Aquino.

The morning after her death, the view outside, from room 1116, where I spent midnight onwards showed me this...



But inside the said room and in the midst of the fuss about Tita Cory's passing, I was having my share of what I would call "mom scare." Unlike the Aquino's I am not ready to lose my mom just yet. Well, I am not ready to lose anyone again for that matter.



I wish I could command the universe when I say that mommy's gonna be fine. I wish. After all, I love my mom. And she need not be sick for me to realize it.

Ano ang Masasabi ko sa "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince?

It showed me a lot and yet it told me nothing.

battik baffled!

Paano Kung Ikaw si Pacman

Sabi nga ng ka-opisina ko sa pinost niyang picture with Manny Pacquiao sa kanyang Facebook account, "Manny makes the world go round."

Partly true nga siya kasi kung iisipin, yung entourage ni Manny ay maituturing na mini-world na especially umiikot sa kanya. Ikaw na ang maging multi-millionaire in dollar proportions! Tapos maski foreign personalities ay nagkakandarapa magpapicture with you at makipag-shake hands. Bongga ang buhay!

Naisip ko tuloy, paano kung maging kasing "laki" ako ni Manny? Mag-iispecial order din ba ako ng seedless grapes, tuna at Vit Water? O tuloy lang ako sa patae-tae lifestyle na kinagisnan ko. Iikot din ba ang mundo sa akin?

Parang ang hirap imagine-in...

There's Something About 30

The first company that hired me, spent its 30th anniversary a few months after I became part of its "family". Incidentally, the company that hired me recently is also celebrating its 30th year. I'm starting to think, there's something about thirty...and me.

I seem to enter these companies in the middle of their anniversary cacophony. But I don't mind. What better way to enter their worlds, right?

Besides, next year I'll be be thirty. Who knows what "something" awaits!

Confessions of a Financial Loser

There is nothing to confess really. Except that, I am a financial loser.

Both my siblings who are working earn extremely more than I do. All of my friends undoubtedly take home more cash than I do. And I have a feeling that all people who are my age and who have similar educational background as mine earn at least twice than I do.

As I've said I am a financial loser.

My savings is zilch. Other than a few peso bills I keep for luck (they include a lot of ten peso bills and a 500-peso bill with "flowers" beside their serial number, plus a hundred-peso bill with the UP centennial logo), I have nothing.

What I do have are debts. That thing my sister paid for me a year ago which I haven't paid back until now and that other plane ticket I am four months away from paying in full.

I do have credit cards with big credit limits. (I have a feeling these credit card companies are conspiring to get me into trouble.) I could go on an extravagant shopping spree with my plastic money! But what will be the point of a series of carefree swipes if my world crumbles at the sight of my credit card statement, right? So I refuse to indulge.

I don't know where my money goes every month. My hard-earned cash, gone without a trace. I'm quite sure it doesn't go to the so-called "social life" because as far as my schedule is concerned, I don't have the luxury of a social life. I am alarmingly behind with my "responsibilities" at home, too. I plea "guilty" to that. I should be crucified.

My brother said I should have a personal accountant who would attend to my "assets." But hiring one would most likely take away what-could-have-been-my-unaccounted-for-assets. Not good at all.

Sometimes, I think, I work for cab drivers. I rack my brain and strain my muscles (mostly my carpal muscles) for more than nine hours a day just so I would have something to pay cab drivers in exchange of the comfort of their cabs and the quick trips they provide. (I have learned to accept that in order for me to have extra time in my hands, I have to "buy" time. Sad thing is, it ain't cheap!)

I have no material investment, except for the low-class tripod I bought some years ago which I hardly use because the camera I consider mine decided to consistently malfunction. I rely on hand-me-downs, from the first cellphone I had, down to the one I am using now, they were all given to me. I could not very well afford one. What more that thing which has morphed into a need than a want for a struggling writer such as myself?

I cannot buy anything anymore. I am a financial loser. It's pathetic.

I sometimes feel that a lucky bet at the lottery is the only key to my "salvation".

Unless I win, I am a loser.

Ang Alamat ng Hot Brazilian Guy

Is he really Brazilian? I would not know for sure. I just see him, almost every morning, sporting his curly hair and the laid-back shirt and pants that drape his lean body, as if he were always on vacation in this country called the Philippines. I consider him as the closest walking person I'd ever see who'll resemble Jude Law. Thus the word "hot."

For quite a while he seems no where to be found. I assumed his visa here had expired and he decided to return to his homeland wherever that is.

But yesterday, just when I was absorbed in my everydays, in my usual trip from home to work, I saw him. The stranger I most fondly refer to as "hot Brazilian guy." I could not help but smile.

Here's the punchline though. A few minutes after checking in to fantasy land, thanks to hot Brazilian guy, reality hit me. In the head. Literally. And the bump left a hump. A tiny hump.

The titanic experience, hulog sa hagdan atbp.

Naisip ko nung isang araw na naglalakad ako sa ilalim ng maalinsangang weather (bale umaambot pero super init) na pinapatay tayo ng nalolokang panahon. Kasi di ba, ang init tapos uulan na parang delubyo level. O kaya naman umuulan pero at the same time ang init ng panahon. Ganon. Kaya yata lagi na lang akong me ubo, sipon, lagnat and what-have-you!

Tapos naalala ko bigla na tao rin ang may kasalanan kung bakit nagkakaganito ang panahon. Alam na naman natin yun. Yung mga polusyon na pinaggagagawa natin ay nagbaback fire na! So nabuo ko ito:

"We started the slaughter. Now it's nature's turn to do the killing."

Ayy! Katakot. It doesn't help that I saw the Nicolas Cage movie called "Knowing." End of the world na may alien intervention ang theme. Di ko siya type. Naweirduhan ako to tell the truth. Saka I'm not much into movies na about the end of the world. Parang mas disturbing siya sa akin than watching "Drag me To Hell" or the likes. Although wala akong balak manood ng "Drag Me to Hell."

Speaking of movies, parang may Titanic moment ako last week when, in the middle of a hot, sunny day, ay bumagyo like crazy sa office. E tamang-tama na nasa canteen kaming apat na magkaka-opisina. Ayun, maya-maya lang e gumagapang na ang baha sa canteen floor. Deadma kami at first kasi gutom kami but in a matter of minutes tumaas na ng 3-4 inches yung baha. So mega sampa kami sa mga chairs. Para kaming nasa Titanic na unti-unting lumulubog but instead na sa Atlantic Ocean, sa baha kami nagsisink! Kaloka! Kinalingan pa kaming isakay sa trolley para maitawid from the canteen to the office proper. Siyempre, adventure na naman. E nung Saturday before that I had my first motorcycle ride. Tapos nademote ako sa trolley. Hehe. Kawawang trolley!

* * *

Siyempre papatulan ko ang Michael Jackson story. Nalungkot ako nung nalaman ko na na-dead na ang King of Pop. Parang lumaki na ako sa tugtog niya. Meron pa nga kaming cassette tape ng "Thriller" noon (na napatungan ng mga boses namin ni Ate. Mahilig kasi kaming magrecord ng boses! hehe). Tapos lagi namin nirereenact yung Thriller MTV ni MJ na natatakot ako every time na napapanood ko. E bukod yata sa Beatles at The Corrs na songs, mga kanta ni Michael Jackson yung marami akong alam na titles.

So Friday ng umaga sabi ng Daddy ko, patay na raw si Michael Jackson. Binuksan ko agad yung radyo ng celphone ko. And ayun na nga confirmed na wala na siya. Mega tribute ang mga radio stations sa kanya. Tumaas yata ang sales ng songs niya. Maski sa music stores, MJ songs ang pineplay at biglang nilabas ang mga MJ albums.

Trivia pala, yung utol ko "Michael" ang pangalan dahil na nga kay Michael Jackson. And then ngayon nadiscover namin na mas magkapangalan pa sila ni MJ than we intended. Michael Joseph si MJ. Joseph Michael ang kapatid ko. Hehe. Bonus Trivia: "Joseph" ang name ng Dad ni MJ.

* * *

Napapansin ko pala na naka-clumsy na ako lately. I'm slowly turning into my Mom. Mommy ko kasi parang may quota na at least 3 times madapa/matalisod/matapilok in a day. Parang napapadalas ang mga"aksidente" ko. Latest mishap ko e last Saturday nung mahulog ako ng ilang steps sa isang hagdan sa Megamall. Mabuti na lang ibang level na ang magpapa-pahiya sa akin kaya deadma lang ako. But then again, sumakit ang kawawang tuhod ko because of my fall. Salamat na lang at nakabangon naman ako.

* * *

Going back to movies, ayun na nga, nagrevenge na ang "Fallen" sa "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen." Medyo me special thing sa puso ko ang "Transformers". Naalala ko kasi 2 years ago, siguro mga around this time din nung lumabas yung "Transformers". Niyaya ko pa si Nichi manood noon kahit na weak na siya. Sabi ko, uupo lang naman siya sa sinehan. Gusto ko rin kasi na maentertain siya. Kaso siya na mismo ang umayaw which is so unlike him kaya sign talaga yon na di na siya OK. Matagal nagstay sa sinehan ang "Transformers". By the time na my brothers and I got to see it, kulang na kami. In spirit na lang namin kasama si Nichi. I guess, parang ganon noong nanood kami nung second installment last Saturday.

I was wearing my "Project: Brave Kids" dog tag. Para well-represented si Nichi. Tapos habang nakaupo ako sa isang bench sa harap ng Bench, may dumaang little boy na naka-Project Brave Kids shirt. Syempre feeling ko sign yon na andon nga si Kulas. :-)

* * *

Di ko na feel magbigay ng review sa Transformers 2. I second the motion na lang yung article na lumabas sa Inquirer last Sunday about the film. Pansin ko lang na talagang packaged as a guy film yung movie dahil sa cars/trucks, action at sa consistent use of Megan Fox as a sex object of sorts. Maganda naman na siya. She is hard to miss given that face of hers. Ewan ko ba kung bakit kelangan ang first appearnce niya sa film e shot niya from her behind. Nag-amok tuloy ang repressed feminista in me.

Hmp! Ayun na.

Mucus Troopers Beware

As I write this piece, I am sort of detained in the lobby of a big food company’s building, thanks to the “glory” that is the A(H1N1) scare. For a community and nation and planet paranoid with this mutated kind of flu, I am a threat. A walking, sneezing and coughing threat.

Thus, I have to contend with a hostile lobby and forgo the meeting which I was initially scheduled to attend. I was banished in the lobby because no brilliant drug company has come up with the magical vaccine that would obliterate the A(H1N1) flu, the same way some geniuses erased small pox and polio on the “now” pages of health journals and medical digests.

Humans are neurotic that way. They fear what they can’t control.

I would hate to admit it but for a few days now, I’ve become the mucus trooper I have grown to detest. Mucus trooper. People who, consciously or unconsciously, are carriers of viruses which they can so easily spread. People who get on with their day, sneezing and coughing, as if nothing were wrong with them.

If I had a choice, I would be at home right now, taking drugs that will eventually “heal” me. Never mind the drowsiness they may cause. I would gladly sleep and be up and well in a day or so. If I had a choice.

But my socio-economic status is, in some absurd way, denying me the right to get sick because one, I can’t afford to seek medical treatment—doctors and drugs included; and two, I can’t afford to take another of those unpaid leaves. I do have bills to pay which I could not possibly do if I don’t work.

I wish to clarify that I am not whining. There are people with far worse socio-economic drama than me. I am lucky to have my bit.

So I am a mucus trooper. But I try to rise above my kind. I cover my mouth whenever I sneeze and cough. I sanitize my hands after I blow my nose. I’m being responsible albeit repressing my body’s call for a break. Even if I have been branded as a threat.

I am a mucus trooper and I am aware of it.

I maybe sick yet I know that the people around me don’t have to be.

And that’s all I have to say about that.

Pers Taym

So they say, there's always a first time for everything. Today I had my latest "first". An exhilarating first. Never saw such "first" coming but life surprises us in unique ways that don't take no for an answer. Next thing I knew, I had to do it.

To ride a motorbike.

How and why this happened?

I was in a hurry. In a real hurry. In a matter-of-life-and-death hurry.

The thing is, not only my life was at stake but also the lives of a whole lot of people who may seem to many as a lucky bunch given the "privilege" of working close to the stars. But behind such luck is a full load of stress that isn't glamorous at all. In such world, lives can sometimes be reduced to a video tape. The one I was in hurry to deliver. The one on which our lives depended on.

Around 11:59 a.m. I was running towards the exit of a train station and there it was. The ride that took 29 years to happen. The motorbike that will save so many asses, including mine.

I think there was a fraction of a second that I hesitated to hop on the thing I always considered as a killer ride but as I've said, I was in no position to say "no."

The screaming and the shrieking were inevitable as far as I'm concerned. My apologies to Kuya Ramil and his damaged ear drums. It is impossible to shut me up if I were THAT afraid. It could have been worse if I kept my eyes open. It could have been worse.

Now I am a firm believer that everyday IS an adventure!

eto na nga!

if there are a few perks in my job, this must be one of them...



hurrah! nahuli din! next time magpapakilala na ako sa kanya. :-)

From Africa with Love. Acheche!

I've never had anything from Africa before. I loved the African goodies which hopefully are A(H1N1)-free. Hahaha! Thanks so much Jamie! :-)

Elephant key chain from Nigeria which looks seriously like a token in the Jumanji game board. Cute!



"Babae na deadly weapon" also from Nigeria. Astig!



May bonus pang sinelas from Dubai! Hehe.

What to Eat? What to Eat?

This is one of 'em, what-to-eat moments c/o my brother (who took the picture)...


I'm posting it for two reasons:
1. It captures that what-to-eat moment I'm talking about, and
2. I'm wearing a skirt. Hah!

Dennis Trillo the Third Time Around

Sa ikatlong pagkakataon, nag-krus na naman ang landas namin ni Dennis Trillo. At sa ikatlong pagkakataon, na-punctuate na hindi niya alam that an entity such as myself exists. Actually, this time, may some sort of eye contact kami (or then again baka feeling ko lang yon). Yun e habang busy akong padaan-daan sa backstage--working--habang siya ay nakikipag-chikahan sa kanyang bagong ka-love team na ke bata bata! (May bahid ng bitterness?!?)

Kung hindi lang ako nagtatrabaho, photo-op na talaga ito...

...matapos kong palampasin yung first time ko siyang nakita sa grocery kung saan busy akong kumakain ng siomai...



...at nung isang araw na pagkagising ko--wala pang ligo ito--ay nasa same building kame dahil magkukwento siya sa mga bata habang ako ay raraket sa building na ito.



Ito lang ang pathetic picture of him na nakuha ko this time:



At salamat kay Thermina Akram may ganito pa ako:



Oh well, sumaya naman ang hapon ko nung directly nasa kaliwa ko lang siya habang ako ay nagtatrabaho at nang magkaharap kami habang iniinterview siya nina Kuya Allan at Kuya Bitoy. Kaso this time, wala nang eye contact. Tsk.Tsk.

Styro Alert!

It's styrofoam everywhere at the Gateway Mall food court!

I was alarmed. I thought malls are taking steps into becoming more Earth-friendly? With the use of recyclable bags being encouraged by many retail stores, I thought Pinoys have realized the NEED to care for mother nature.

I must be wrong then. Or then again it must be the Gateway administration that must rethink their abuse of non-biodegradable polystyrene foam which we all know isn't earth-friendly at all.

Perhaps a boycott will MAKE them think...

angels in demons

*it's not everyday that i get to go home at nine. so today's a gift. *

last weekend, i had the pleasure of catching "angels and demons" on the big screen. i will admit that i haven't read the book. i tried. a good three years ago. but somewhere, somehow i shelved the book for other readings. for less serious readings. i was thinking the "da vinci code" will do as far as dan brown is concerned.

but curiosity encouraged me to see the movie based on the dan brown book i hardly read despite how i didn't quite enjoy the movie translation of his first book which had the same director as "angels and demons".

again, curiosity encouraged me to pay. i wasn't disappointed much. "angels and demons" is a way better movie that the "da vinci code". now i feel the need to read the book. let's see if i'll be disappointed (on the book or the movie).

it helped that i didn't know what to expect...who the perpetrator is. so i was glued to the theater seat. the movie turned out to be the suspense whodunnit it was trying to be. although subtle clues -- who stands behind a shadow the first time he appears, the reason for a character's existence -- gave away the bad guy even before he revealed himself.

i shall no longer talk about the point the movie tries to put on the table. i leave that to dan brown, his collaboration with ron howard and the viewer's opinions and whatnots. at this point, i find it redundant to discuss such matter. i will not be the expert a lot of people pretend to be.

let it be known, however, that although i very much appreciate ewan mcgregor's presence in the movie, he was rather distracting. i got lost in the middle of his speech for the members of the conclave. i didn't understand a thing he said. not because he did not enunciate his words well enough. i was preoccupied with one thought. one poignant thought that circled the confines of my skull...

how the hell could one think dirty thoughts of the gorgeous ewan mcgregor when he is wearing a priest's suit?!

yes. it is easier to fantasize about him if you stare at him on that men's perfume ad that caught my attention in the airport a year ago.

yay! i should have called this entry "demons in angels."